After all the turmoil of moving to Bellies. After the three weeks of being left alone for hours after hours. After trying and failing to adjust to the heat. After failing to enjoy drinking the cool water. (the water to swim in tastes like salt) AND after getting no sleep for 3 weeks, my people do this…
So I wake up one morning after finally sleeping in past 8am and I just know something is up. Ronnie & Lisa are running around like crazy people. Laughing and scheming, but for what? I don’t know. They have hardly sat still since we moved here, so I’m guessing this won’t be any different. Finally they say, “Do you want to go for a ride?” Well, heck yeah I want to go for a ride. Can’t you see my tail wagging faster than a Blink 182 metronome?
I want to go wherever you will take me. Especially a ride. Wind in my face. New smells. Guilt free farting. Yep, let’s go!
So off we go, in the 90 degree heat…. in a golf cart…. with no AC. I was not built for AC-less travel. I’m big, I’m furry, how could it get any hotter? Then it got hotter. We stopped at a roadside bar. I don’t know the name but it rhymed with beano and chilies. I can stand the heat, because I smell food and where there’s food, there’s people dropping food. So I’m going to get a sand covered burrito if I keep my nose open. So I ate and ate and ate and pee’d and ate and ate and pooped and ate and drank and ate.. you get the drift.
Now I’m ready for a nap.
I find a dry, cool, pee-less, poop-less, spot under a table and take nap. Finally I’m out of the heat!
Then all of a sudden, I’m awoken by Lisa who thinks I am cold. My friend Otis was there with his people. He has no fur. He was hot. What makes Lisa think I am cold?
So she puts this padded suit on me. A suit with a hood! Yeah a hood! Then grabs me by the leash and drags me around the place. Now I’m hot, tired and blind from all the flash photography. Is that enough ridicule? No, after waiting in line for 210 minutes (30 minutes human time) … I actually enjoyed that part. Many, many, new dogs to smell and meet… but I digress… Then she makes me walk up on a platform just to show everyone how totally humiliating it is to be me.
The ridicule is over and I’m allowed to go back to sleep.
Then all of a sudden, bam! Lisa is back and on goes the coat again! Then again, I’m paraded up and blinded again…. Only good thing was meeting Josh Nunez and Miss San Pedro. Great people.
Finally we get to “go for the ride”. I’m so delirious that I don’t remember the first one. 45 minutes later, what’s that? AC, my good buddy Air Conditioning how I missed you. I remember passing out and ignoring requests to “do my business” outside.
I had a fun time, but a bear’s gotta sleep!